1 post tagged “vmas”

Oh Britney. Dear, dear Britney. What happened to the days of you romping around the VMA stage with snakes and glitter and occasionally Madonna?

You would always lip sync your heart out, and hot damn, what a performer you were. Justin would observe with an equal measure of longing and hatred as you sex kittened your way into every middle aged man’s dreams.

And then ….. The 2007 VMAS.

BABE:  this was your SHOT. Your CHANCE.

To beat down the haters.

To show once and for all “I’m Britney, Bitch!” - Despite the loser husband, the barefoot gas station bathroom visit, the two gene-deprived children, various public viewings of your private parts and the shaved head shenanigans.

You could have left it all behind.

But instead, you showed off your not insubstantial belly, your chipped nails, your doped up rhythm, and margarita laden dance moves.

It was truly a cataclysmic train wreck of historic pop culture proportion.

So what now Britney?

Sucker that I am, I still hold out hope for you. Will you apologize to JT and Timberland?

Will you finally bounce back and silence the critics?  

Don’t break our hearts once again.